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We typically think of wedding season as being spring and summer but to the Amish fall ushers in the beginning of the marriage season.

With basements filled with bountiful canning jars and silos bursting with winter feed the harvest season comes to an end as the anticipation of wedding season begins.

In early autumn the Amish community will start speculating whose home will be hosting a wedding celebration. Engagements are kept secret all summer long and are only announced or “published” at church a few weeks prior to the actual event.

I can’t help to think how exciting it must be for a young couple to keep such an important life event quiet for so long.  The thought of secretly planning a wedding with only a few choice family members knowing will help build the anticipation of the wedding. I think we all could learn a thing or two about keeping secrets and planning a simple wedding. To the Amish marriage is a lifelong commitment and divorce is not an option.  For better or worse until death do us part is taken seriously even though they do not recite those exact words in their ceremony. The only exception to this vow is if one spouse passes away, the other spouse is free to marry again.

It would not be uncommon for more than 500 guests to be invited to a wedding and is usually held at the bride’s parents home. Amish weddings commonly are held on Tuesday’s or Thursdays, but with more and more weddings taking place they now are often held on Saturday’s as well.

The bride will not wear white but will pick her favorite color for a new dress from the acceptable colors of her community. At Amish weddings, bridesmaids and groomsmen are called sidesitters and will join the couple at the head table called the “Eck” meaning corner reserved for the wedding party.

The wedding service is much like a church service, and only after the sermon is complete, the minister will ask the bride and groom to come forward so he can ask them the marriage questions which is similar to wedding vows.

An Amish Wedding

I came across my own wedding vows the other day, and it got me wondering what the marriage vows were like in an Amish ceremony. After a bit of research, I was able to find it shared by Lester Beachy in his book “Our Amish Values – Who we are and what we believe.”

Amish Marriage Vows

Both are asked this first question:

Can you both confess that God has ordained marriage to be a union between one man and one wife, and do you also have the confidence that you are approaching marriage in accordance with the way you have been taught?

Answer: Yes, from the Bridegroom

Answer: Yes, from the Bride

The Bridegroom is asked:

Do you also have the confidence, Brother, that the Lord has provided this, our Sister, as a marriage partner for you?

Answer: Yes

The Bride is asked:

Do you also have the confidence, Sister, that the Lord has provided this, our Brother, as a marriage partner for you?

Answer: Yes

The Bridegroom is asked:

Do you also promise your wife that if she should become in bodily weakness, sickness, or any similar circumstances need your help, that you will care for her as is fitting for a Christian husband?

Answer: Yes

The Bride is asked:

Do you promise your husband the same thing, that if he should in bodily weakness, sickness, or any other similar circumstances need your help, that you will care for him as is flitting a Christian wife?

Answer: Yes

Both are then asked:

Do you promise together that you will come with love, forbearance and patience live with each other, and not part from each other until God will separate you in death?

Answer: Yes, from the Bridegroom

Answer: Yes, from the Bride

No exchange of rings, no lavish destination wedding, no exotic honeymoon spots. Just a God-centered simple marriage where two people join as one to start a life guided by God and surrounded by family.

Photo by Jim Fisher